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Gobble, gobble

“Norman the turkey will live past Thanksgiving, rescue group says”” was a headline in the Thanksgiving edition of the Freeman.

I was reading that as I was ironically eating turkey yesterday.

I began to think about the birds that made it, and those who didn’t.

Here is one that made it:

The Associated Press reported that “May,” above, was pardoned by President Bush at the White House on Thursday. The bird here is riding atop a float as she serves as honorary grand marshal of the Thanksgiving Day Parade on Main Street in Disney’s Magic Kingdom on Thanksgiving Day. Which is understandable. I would also go to Disneyland if my life was pardoned or if I were to win the Superbowl.

Here is one turkey that didn’t make it, as reported by the Associated Press:

Rachel Portnoy, 17, center, said the turkey “exploded” after her father, Rich Portnoy (behind Rachel), had taken out of the oven the 72-pound dressed bird.

Let me repeat that: A 72-POUND TURKEY.

Rich Portnoy has an annual contest with his sister, who lives in Virginia, on who has the biggest turkey. Rich was victorious this year (duh!), with a 59-week-old turkey the family bought from an area farmer.

The family gave the bird a nickname: “Barry Bonds.”

“I feel like I won the World Series,” said Ron about finding the large bird, fitting it in the oven and then tasting the flavorful turkey, which hopefully didn’t have any steroids.

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